Self-Transformation starts with the “Self-Help” transformation process; a process expected to be followed by all “Yourself Helper” users. The “Volunteer-Help” transformation process is almost identical to the earlier process, replacing the initial “Awareness” step with an “Acceptance” step. As the “Administration-Help” process is still work-in-progress, this will be explained in more detail at some later time.
- Self-help “Awareness” is the primary function of the “Yourself Helper” (YSH) social network platform; towards better knowing your authentic-self and how your senses relate to the world around you. The seminal website content supporting this step is designed as a placeholder for eventual replacement by specialist experts in each subject presented. These experts are referred to as a Subject Matter Expert (SME), shown to be part of the “Administration-Help” process.
No-one knows you better than yourself. This first important awareness step emphasises that nothing is too small to empower ordinary people into moving through an awakening doorway to self-transformation. Your five senses (sight, hearing, taste, smell and touch) provide you with all the necessary tools for self-awareness. Having an awareness sensation, typically sets off a chain of events that can pave the way for future possibilities. It mobilises energy within you; that you either respond to in full/part or back away from (usually out of fear). If you choose to respond, you allow the energy to awaken in you all sorts of possibilities. You become open to the possibility that there may be a better path, for a more authentic journey that your life might now take.
Reading and listening are the two most empowering sensory tools for personal growth; towards being the best you can be right now. Reading and mindful reflection upon how you feel (what touches you) are the essential links in the process. For this reason the website (presently non-SME) content serves as a placeholder or stake-in-the-ground, describing the type of material sought from SMEs. The content material is designed to remind the reader to live as a full participant in your life, not as a spectator who unconsciously drifts along. Prospective SME volunteers would be identified through reading this placeholder Self-Help content, in the hope that they may be able to add value, greater authenticity or, better still, take ownership; being their line of expertise. The content subject material would then become classified as being “authenticated” by an SME.
- Self-help “Awakening” is the first stage of self-transformation. After reading on a particular subject of interest to you, a series of optional pre-prepared open questions are put to you for your own personal reflection. You may feel that an awakening has been stirred sufficiently from the material read already. Stirred enough to enable you to express your response accordingly. The need for you to be true to yourself and only yourself in getting to know your authentic-self, raises the very real possibility that some of your responses may be so personal that you might not want to have such awakenings shared with anyone else but yourself. To cater for this, your accumulated awakening knowledge about self is only ever managed on your own personal computer, iPad, etc. For example, you may feel the need to explain some tragic circumstances in your life, like a divorce, a death, a natural catastrophe, a business failure; all possibly containing hidden gifts of a potential awakening. In my case, one of these was a near death experience (NDE) that occurred in my 20s after running a marathon. After much reflection, this event lead to major transformations in my life for the better, a change in career, location, in priorities, etc. that opened up unimaginable opportunities. Even to share this with you now, still makes me feel uncomfortable.
Rather than wait around for a catastrophic event to occur in your life, this seminal version of the “Yourself Helper” website targets some specific big hard problems relevant to most ordinary people in western society as well as availing volunteer opportunity for much smaller projects of good works. Rather than ignore unresolved issues or any potentially damaging problems lurking on the edges, the awakening step opens you to these possibilities for your own reflection. So that you too might experience an awakening to any need for you to address such potential problems earlier rather than later; the process exposes any potential gaps in your life. For when you are hit with a resultant catastrophic event (like discovering you have contracted type 2 diabetes over the years because of your obesity), it may already be too late for effective correction. The awakening process may sound like bad news, ie. being on a constant treadmill of self-reflection in order to be more mindful of your problems. But the good news is that it regularly affords you the opportunity to deal with these “internal saboteurs” long before they become catastrophic, when they can be “nipped in the bud”. Better than keeping your head in the sand in search of other pre-occupations specifically designed to take our minds off your problems (eg. addictive substances, comfort food, computer games, pornography, gambling, etc.), you are exposed to “authenticated” opportunities of self-help. Help that requires a response through your senses in the form of actions towards taking greater control of your own life.
To assist some through this step a well proven LNP (Neuro-Linguistic-Programming) approach is recommended to assist ordinary people like yourself change the way they think and behave. Some scientists call this process “neural plasticity” to awakening the brain to its full potential by identifying and exercising those parts which are constraining them to gain control of their sub-conscious mind.
“The best idea ever had is pointless if never acted upon”. For this reason your awakenings are not only noted but prepared in fashion which can be acted upon and eventually instilled as a response from your senses in the form of a commitment to deliberate pro-active action(s) of self-help. Otherwise you are doomed to allow the inner problem to worsen and simply postpone the crisis that is eventually awaiting. This is sometimes call “running the gauntlet”.
- Self-Help “Activation” is a call to action from within, following an awakening of love/concern for self, others or your surroundings and a commitment to take a small but significant step along your journey of self-transformation. Your default response is either annoyance (fight) or defensiveness (flight). Better to welcome the annoyance as an empowering wakeup-call putting yourself on the right path than keep your head in the sand in the hope that the problem will simply go away. Better to commit to a forward direction where growth is most needed than avoid change and never grow to be the best you could be. By becoming aware of your growth opportunities, you see things differently. Taking upon a journey of self-transformation constantly enables you to be the best you can be right now. For “now” is the only thing that is real to you. Your past; you cannot change, only learn from. Your future unknown and uncertain; but now open to new possibilities.
To facilitate this step, you are provided with an Action Plan template accompanied by a sample complete template. The template is constructed from much of the awakening material you prepared in your previous step. How might you best determine whether the actions you have committed to take on the right track delivering positive results? Are they making you happier, improving your self-confidence and self-esteem, are you more at peace with yourself, do you feel you are heading in the right direction now? These obvious questions lead you to the final step in the process – the need for authentic “Accountability”. There is little point kidding yourself about information that is purely for your digestion alone; information to reflect upon and be mindful of your own now situation. Unless your own self-assessment is “authentic”, you are only trying to fool yourself. Trying to fool oneself is to be delusional – a mental problem in itself.
- Self-Help “Accountability”, like any journey, being accountable for your own actions is to heal the wound, to fill the gaps in your life and be able to move on from this problem altogether. Remember no one is perfect and therefore we all have gaps to fill, even you. Sure your “success measures” may have been met, but are you healed? Is this state sustainable and will you be able to keep your problem at bay and maintain living a good life?
In your previous Action Plan you were able to constantly measure your journey’s progress across your map (of life) you ensure that you remain on track with the commitments you made to yourself and that you are heading in the right direction to where you aspire to be right now.
Becoming accountable is the most important step in freeing yourself from the tyranny of your sub-conscious mind.
“No one is making me feel anything that does not already live inside me. If the upset lasts for more than 30 seconds, then this is old stuff that is coming up”.
Give your conscious mind some space, a chance to think to become mindful of your commitments to having a good life. Otherwise you sub-conscious mind wants to analyse, to figure things out and keep you going around and around like a merry-go-round. When you pay total attention to the feeling and release it completely, you become free to be whatever you choose because of your insightfulness and rational conscious mind now has control.
An important part of being engaged in a transformation journey is to be fully accountable and responsible for your own actions. You become re-assured that your actions have the potential to deliver your desired outcomes and are sustainable because the advice being followed is based upon yours and many others’ past experiences and successes.
As each “now” measure is taken, there are self-choices to be made about your Action plan:
a) Continue “as is”
b) Seek more “Self-help” awareness & refine your action plan
c) Seek external help (Volunteer or Professional)
d) Stop what you are doing (and start again)
If either options a) or b) is the answer continue to repeat and enrich the process – the ideal outcome. If option c) is selected this would suggest a shift to another “Volunteer Self-Help” process.
The next “Yourself Helper” process is the creation and engagement of a bank of Volunteers, well versed in specific problem domains where currently ordinary people are seeking help. Each volunteer will have read the pertinent Self-Help “Awareness” material and been authenticated as a subject volunteer willing and able to help others in need of such help. Some volunteer applicants may have already mastered the specific problem domain already and be keen to apply their experience as part of their “give back”. Others may have successful avoided the problem by constantly making decisions along the lines of the Self-Help content material/guidelines and feel they are now also in a position to help those in need (of their help). The needy Requestor for help has now shifted to a greater sensory listening paradigm.
Volunteer-Help “Acceptance” is the first step in the process; matching the authenticated needs of ordinary people (articulate at step 4 in their Self-Help process) against authenticated volunteers deemed capable of availing themselves to help others in need of their caring skills. The bank of volunteers specialising in this problem domain are scanned for the best fit; by either the Requestor in need, a Volunteer or by the SME. To consummate the match both Volunteer and Requester must first commit to the “Acceptance” of the arrangement and have the same managed under the auspices of a Care Programme/Project. One of the first agreed tasks would be for the accepting Volunteer to review the measured results of the Requestor’s earlier Self-Help process results and listen to the Requestor’s explanation for needing additional help. As touched upon earlier, the Requestor would be free to determine what relevant personal information they are prepared to share with the Volunteer just now. Whatever is shared needs to be authentic self-information. Over time, as trust and measured results grow, the extent of self-information exchange may or may not open up further. The most important exchange is the joint action plan committed to by both Requestor and Volunteer and the agreed metrics used to measure it’s deliverables in accordance with SME metric benchmarks. Through the sharing of the authenticated metric results both parties can have meaningful discussions about these specific personal findings in the “Awakening” step. The likes of which value-add would not have been possible in the equivalent “Self-Help” step.
Remains work-in-progress and a draft version is to be presented latter after feedback on the material above is received.
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